Charli Dee

The Sunshine Blogger Award: Part 2

I’ve been nominated for the Sunshine Blogger Award again! I feel so blessed and honored! This time the nomination comes from fellow blogger Catherine Mellen! I decided to do a separate post for this one to keep my previous Sunshine Blogger post from being too long. It also gives me a chance to pass the honor on to even more fellow bloggers! Catherine Mellen is a personal blogger. The purpose of her blog, Shatter the Silence/A Life Given to Me, is for her to share traumatic experiences from her childhood. Her message is you don’t have to be ashamed of what you’ve been through, and do not let anyone keep you from telling your truth. Get to know her and read her story here.

About the Sunshine Blogger Award

The Sunshine Blogger Award is an award given by bloggers to their peers to honor fellow bloggers who inspire and spread positivity through their blogs.

Rules for the Sunshine Blogger Award

Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blogging site.
List the Sunshine Blogger Award rules and display the logo on your site
Answer the Sunshine Blogger Award questions.
Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
Notify the nominees about their nominations

Questions from Catherine Mellen

How often do you navigate to other Blogs & do you interact?

I interact very often with other bloggers actually! I also visit many other blogs too! For bloggers, supporting each other is key! Plus, I enjoy meeting new people and getting to know them through their blogs!

2) Do your love ones support your Blog?

I don’t talk all that much about my blog with my friends and family. I’m too shy to! My friends and family don’t read my blog posts or give likes or comments, but but the ones who do know about my blog give lots of encouragement, and listen to me talk about my blog (I bragged a lot about this sunshine blogger award)!

3) Are you embarrassed of your Blog?

Not at all! The very opposite actually! I’m very proud of my blog! I hesitated when starting my blog, because I wasn’t completely sure how comfortable I would feel sharing some of the things I’ve shared in my posts. That’s the closest I’ve come to embarrassment. However, I’m very glad I went through with starting a blog, and I’m am so happy with the wonderful feedback I’ve been getting so far! The support from the blogging community is beyond amazing!

4) If you had a choice to Blog for life or publish one book for life… Which would you choose?

Hard! Very hard! I can’t choose! If I really had to choose one though, I would probably pick to blog for life. Can I cheat and write a little about any stories I might write on my blog? I don’t have to publish them! I just want people to know they exist!

5) Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall?

Winter please! The spring and fall seasons are too erratic! One day it’s too warm, the next day it’s cool. One day it’s sunny, the next day it’s raining. I can’t deal with that! Winter and summer are consistent. Winter is always cold, and summer is always hot. There’s normally no second guessing the weather! I can’t handle the heat though, so winter it is!

6) Wine or Weed? Can’t be both

Interesting question! I’ve actually never had any of either!

7) How many websites do you share your Blog too?

I actually I have several social media accounts for my blog. However, I’ve been focusing on Pinterest, Facebook and a Twitter.

8) How often do you Blog?

I don’t have a set blogging schedule yet. I’m still working that. So far I’ve been putting out around two posts per month, but mostly my posting pattern has been a bit erratic.

9) Favorite Blogging Platform?

As in my favorite site to for publishing my posts? Since becoming a blogger I’ve heard of several platforms, however, the ones I know best are blogger and WordPress. I started my blogging journey on blogger, but blogger wasn’t working for me. I decided to move to WordPress, and I’m so glad I did! My blogging experience improved instantly after the switch!

10) Do you agree 11 questions are too many? 🤣

😂 Well, it definitely helps give the post some length!

11) Any summer fun plans?

Not really! I just plan on relaxing and having fun! I’m not looking forward to the heat though!

My Nominees

It’s my pleasure to pass this honor on to even more amazing bloggers! Here are my second set of nominees!

La Frieda Smith – MMM of Family Entertainment
Doctor’s Orders – Doctor’s Orders
The Comic Vault – The Comic Vault
Devinder Maan – Fabulous Fifty Five
Dayma – Women Undefined
Romani Sanchez – Sanchez Proofreading
Camilla – Northern Fairytales
The Godly Chick Diaries – The Godly Chick Diaries
Jamie – Chasing the Lions
K.C. – Live the Frugal Life
Michelle – Garden of Aquarius

My Questions

Which of your blog posts is your favorite?
What is your favorite color?
What is your favorite food?
Do you have a secret talent?
Which season (spring, winter, summer, fall) is your favorite?
What song would be your theme or anthem?
Who is your favorite celebrity?
Do you have a favorite book?
Do you have a favorite movie?
Do you have a tv show you’re binging on right now?
Is the one thing you love most about blogging?

The Sunshine Blogger Award: Part 1

I’ve been nominated! This time it’s for the Sunshine Blogger Award! I am so honored! I was nominated by fellow bloggers Kimberly Leatherwood and Jess Ling! Thank-you so much ladies! Both Kimberly and Jess are lifestyle bloggers and their blogs cover a variety of topics. The main characteristic of their blogs is that they share what their passions are at the moment and their adventures. They’re enjoying life and taking their readers on a nice ride with them! Their blogs are fun to explore, so definitely check them out! Get to know Kimberly Leatherwood at her blog All in with Kimmie L. Get to know Jess Ling at her blog Jerserry.

About the Sunshine Blogger Award

The Sunshine Blogger Award is an award given by bloggers to their peers to honor fellow bloggers who inspire and spread positivity through their blogs.

Rules for the Sunshine Blogger Award

Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blogging site.
List the Sunshine Blogger Award rules and display the logo on your site
Answer the Sunshine Blogger Award questions.
Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
Notify the nominees about their nominations

Questions from Kimberly Leatherwood

What is the number one thing on your bucket list?

To do a little traveling! I don’t really travel. Not even around my own country (the U.S.), so I might like to travel around the U.S., and I would also like to do a little international traveling.

2. Why did you start blogging?

Blogging was always something I wanted to do. I just never had the time. I started slowing down this year, and decided I wanted to finally start a blog. I’m so glad I did!

3. What is your dream car?

I don’t really have a favorite car model!

4. If you could travel to any place in the world, where would it be and why?

Maybe Spain or Costa or Costa Rica. I’ve been trying to learn some Spanish, so I would love to visit one of those countries and stay there for a little while to become a little more fluent.

5. What is your favorite holiday? Why?

It’s between Christmas and Thanksgiving! I’m leaning a little towards more thanksgiving! I love the feeling the Christmas holiday brings. However, thanksgiving is the holiday that’s most special to my family. We are always so busy, so it’s often very hard for us to come together and spend quality time with each other. Thanksgiving is that one special time when we put our busy schedules aside.

6. If you could sit down for one hour with anyone, living or dead, who would it be and why?

This is hard! Wow! If I have to choose though, I would pick James McAvoy. I love him! I would be so nervous that the hour would probably seem so long, but he is so funny so he would probably make all the butterflies go away by making me laugh!

7. What is your motto or favorite quote?

I love “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. It teaches that beauty is subjective, and what one person sees as unattractive might be seen as beautiful to another. That’s the whole idea behind art. If something is deemed as art to someone who sees it, it is art. It is also why every person is beautiful. Beauty can be found in everyone.

8. Are you a dog person, cat person, or something else?

I don’t have any pets, but I honestly love both cats and dogs! If I had to choose though, I would say i’m dog person.

9. What is the best gift you have ever received

This pretty hard! I’ve received many lovely and thoughtful gifts! If I really have to choose though, I would say a book that my Dad bought for me one Christmas. What was really special was the note he placed inside the book for me. He told me how much he appreciated me and to never change. That meant a lot to me!

10. What is one thing you would like to learn to do?

I would love to be able to speak Spanish fluently!

11. What is one little-know fact about you?

I can play a little piano!

Questions from Jess Ling

How do you spend your free time?

I mostly spend time reading or with my family.

2. What are your top three favorite books and why?

Right now I’m reading Becoming by Michelle Obama. I’m really enjoying it! Another book I loved was Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption by Laura Hillenbrand. Last, but in no way least, the Bible!

3. What are you most afraid of?

Heights!

4. What is your strongest personal quality?

I’d like to think that I’m a pretty empathetic person and that is my strongest personal quality. I like to let others judge these things for themselves though!

5. If you could witness any event of the past, present, or future, what would it be?

Very interesting question! I would probably go to the past and witness the creation of the world. I’ll leave the future a mystery!

6. What job do you think you’d be really good at?

A job that involves helping the public such as a social worker or teacher.

7. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in?

Hard question! I’m not really sure! There are so many great stories out there, but I would never want to live in any of those universes! I am happy right where I am!

8. Are you usually early or late?

Definitely an early bird!

9. What do you wish you knew more about?

Good question! I love learning! There is so much to learn, and even when formal education is over you don’t stop learning. What do I wish I knew more about though? I don’t really know how to answer. There’s so much I want to learn, and no where near enough time!

10. What is your best childhood memory?

Hard! I have many! If I had to pick one though, I would say when I got to be a part of a bridal party at a wedding.

11. What do you feel most proud of?

Right now I’m very proud of my blog and my accomplishments with it so far.

My Nominees

I came across many wonderful blogs deserving of this honor, but I can only choose eleven! Here are the eleven blogs I chose! They are all wonderful, so do give them a look!

1. Savannah Nelson – Sunshine with Savannah

2. Dimi – Monkey’s Travel

3. Nadine – Home of Understanding

4. Kelly – Mindfully Mad

5. Michelle – Blessings by Me

6. Sandra Morgan – Chatting with San

7. Natasha – Grateful Grumbles

8. Lloyd Stevens – My Food and Drink Lifestyle

9. Amanda Romero – Behind a Smart and Girly Mindset

10. Jeanne – My Perpetual Project

11. Myworldmyrules – The World of an Autistic, Dyslexic, with Depression and Spinal Problems

My Questions

Which of your blog posts is your favorite?
What is your favorite color?
What is your favorite food?
Do you have a secret talent?
Which season (spring, winter, summer, fall) is your favorite?
What song would be your theme or anthem?
Who is your favorite celebrity?
Do you have a favorite book?
Do you have a favorite movie?
Do you have a tv show you’re binging on right now?
Is the one thing you love most about blogging?

Teacher Appreciation Week

This week is Teacher Appreciation Week. I had many wonderful teachers who had a huge role in shaping who I am today. However, if I had to pick one teacher who made the biggest impact in my life, I would have to pick my first grade teacher. Let’s call her Miss. Z.

When I was a child I had a terrible attention span. That’s the case for most children, but my attention span was short even for a child. I was easily distracted by anything. Instead of listening to my teacher, I would play with whatever might be in my hands, or I would turn my attention to what’s going on outside if I happened to be near a window. Sometimes it would be so bad that I would be daydreaming the whole class time and forget to write down the homework. My mother would get furious whenever that happened! Both my parents and teacher started to worry about me. Miss. Z started working on ways to help me, such as giving me extra attention. She also collaborated with my parents. For instance, she would have my parents sit in class with me. My parents also tried to do their part by helping me at home. Miss. Z suggested timing me while I did my homework, which is exactly what my parents did. Miss. Z recognized that I needed a lot of help, but she didn’t lower her expectations for me. She didn’t ignore my struggles, and believed that with help I could be just as successful as my peers.

All of the intervention helped. My attention span is still not great, but it has improved tremendously since elementary school. I am very grateful for Miss. Z. Here in the U.S., a teacher’s job is not easy, especially if the teacher is working in a public school. Many classrooms in public schools have classes with around 30 students. It is not easy to pay attention to that many children. Also, the work load can be very heavy. On top of planning lessons the teacher has to grade the classroom assignments, homework assignments, projects, and tests of around 30 students. The teaching profession also doesn’t receive as much respect as some other professions. These are some of the few reasons many teachers here in America often leave the profession behind after a short while. In fact, statistics show that around 50 percent of new teachers leave the profession within their first five years, and around 52 percent of current American public school teachers have 10 or less years of teaching experience.

However, teaching is a very significant profession. Pretty much every other profession starts with a teacher. Whatever profession a person is in he or she needed to learn how to do his or her job, and the person who taught him or her was a teacher. Also, a teacher’s job is not just to teach. In the case of children, the teacher is like a second parent, and spends the most time with his or her students outside of the parents. It is the teacher’s job to pay close attention to the students and notice anything out of the ordinary. A child may be going through abuse at home, or might have a disability (the latter was the case for me), and it is part of a teacher’s job to catch these possibilities. If a child is struggling at home or is struggling with a disability, the child will also struggle to learn.

Despite all the hardships that come along with the teaching profession, my teacher Miss. Z still managed to notice my struggles, and give me the attention I needed to overcome them. I appreciate her and teachers like her who genuinely care about their students and take their jobs seriously. To all teachers here in the U.S. and around the world, Happy Teacher’s Appreciation Week!

Source

Facts about the Teaching Profession for a National Conversation about Teaching. United States of America Department it Education, https://www2.ed.gov/documents/respect/teaching-profession-facts.doc

The Blogger Recognition Award: The Importance of Telling your Story

What is important is not so much what is told…but but rather that telling occurs.
Mark Sanders

I was recently nominated for the Blogger Recognition Award by fellow blogger Mama Robbins! Thankyou so much Mama Robbins! Our jobs are necessary, but it is important to have a balance between work and leisure. Laziness can have a negative impact on your life, but so can overworking. Social media can affect you negatively as well if you give your accounts too much of your time. It’s said that too much of a good thing can be a bad thing. Sometimes it can be difficult to balance your time on social media, time with family, time with friends, and time on work (your job and household duties). Mama Robbins’ blog, Mama Robbins Series- An Undistracted Life, covers all these issues. Helping her readers build time management and goal setting skills while helping them to appreciate the special people in their lives is the purpose of Mama Robbins’ blog. Take a look at her lovely blog with this link: http://mamarobbinsseries.ca

About the Blogger Recognition Award:

The Blogger Recognition Award is an online award given by bloggers to other bloggers. It is a way to recognize the work of other bloggers, and award them for the work they put into putting out blog posts. It is definitely hard work, so I’m very honored to be receiving this award!

Rules:

Thank the nominator, and publish a post on your blog about receiving the Blogger Recognition Award. Make sure to provide a link to the nominator’s blog in your post.
Give a brief story of how your blog started.
Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers.
Nominate 10-15 other bloggers for this award, and inform them of their nomination.

The Story of Life with Charli

Sometime when I was in elementary school, I was given my first diary. That’s when I realized how much I enjoy writing. I loved writing down my thoughts, and I found that I express myself more easily through writing than speaking. Not long after receiving my first diary, I heard of Jewish diarist Anne Frank. I got a chance to read her diary when I was in middle school, and was so moved by her story. She wanted to be a writer, and I’m sure she would have made a wonderful one had she gotten the opportunity. Her style of writing and describing her surroundings and feelings were beautiful. I even tried to imitate her style in my own diary. It didn’t quite work out, and I eventually developed my own style of writing, though Anne Frank’s diary is still inspiration. Today, many survivors of the holocaust travel around the world to share their experiences. Their stories are important parts of history. We never know how important our stories are, and how they might impact someone else’s life. With our experiences, we can let someone know they’re not alone in whatever situation they’re going through, help someone learn something new, or help others view a situation from a different perspective. This was my reason for starting Life with Charli. After spending some time writing in my diary and reading blog posts, I decided I wanted to start a blog of my own to share my experiences. I eventually searched ways to start one, but life prevented me from getting a blog up and running. This year, I managed to slow down a little bit and find time to do something I’ve always wanted to do. So far, I’ve gotten wonderful feedback on my blog, that includes this award nomination, and I feel as if my blog might be accomplishing the goals I set for it. It’s definitely an amazing feeling.

Advice for New Bloggers

I’m a new blogger myself, as my blog has only been around for about two months, so this would be advice from one new blogger to another.

1. Patience is key! As a new blogger it will take time to learn all you need to know about building a successful blog. I’m still learning myself! When you start your blog you might have so many ideas in your head for blog posts, but before you start flooding your blog with posts take time to learn.

2. My second piece of advice is related to the first one. Take time to network in between blog posts. Take time to connect with your readers, network with other bloggers. This will help promote your blog and get you noticed. Your blog may be wonderful, and you may have great content, but no one would know if you don’t slow down to promote yourself.

My Nominees:

Picking only 10-15 blogs to pass this honor on to out of all the wonderful blogs I’ve come across was difficult! However, here are my lovely nominees! Be sure give these blogs a look if you haven’t already!

1. Scottmanntn – https://speakingbipolar.com/

2. Bookaholic Brittany – https://bookaholicbrittany.wordpress.com

3. Savannah Nelson – https://sunshinewithsavannah.com/

4. Natalka Antoniuk – http://iwanttobuyahouse.co.uk

5. Raheela James – https://bizmom101.com

6. Disabled Disney – https://www.disableddisney.com/

7. Spence – https://themindberg.com/

8. Lesley Skinner – https://doinglifewithhislight.com

9. Reid and Rachel – https://randrwander.com

10. Emma – https://simplyemsblog.wordpress.com

11. Jessica Carter – https://welcometospanish1.com

12. Kem – https://kemwritingfrom.home.blog/

13. Maya – http://mayanirvana.co.uk

14. The Herstun Writer – https://herstun.com

15. Sarah Winton – http://poutineandprada.com

Because Every day is Mother’s Day

When I was a small girl, I was told about a young woman whose house burst into flames. While trying to escape, the woman’s only concern was her infant daughter. The baby girl came out of the ordeal just fine. The woman was not as fortunate. She suffered severe burns from the fire that left terrible scars. As the baby girl grew older, she started to become ashamed of her mother. She always avoided carrying friends over to her house. Her mother eventually died one day, and it wasn’t until then when the girl realized how much she took her mother for granted. It wasn’t until then when she was reminded that her mother only had terrible scars because of her desire to protect her daughter.

My parents told me that story, and it was was only one of many discussions I had with my parents that reminded me not to take anything precious in my life for granted. Another incident was when I was talking with my father while we were listening to the radio. A commercial for 1-800-flowers played suddenly, and after the commercial finished my father asked “Do you know when they make the most money outside of valentine’s day?”

“No.” I answered.

“Mother’s day.” he said.

He went onto tell me that he would have to do his research to know if he was actually correct, but he was sure that mother’s day was one of the times in the year that brought in a lot of money for companies like 1-800-flowers. The reason he mentioned for this was he believes a lot of adults wait until Mother’s Day to show affection to their mothers. We are sometimes too busy to give any attention to our parents, so Mother’s Day is one of those special days to do so. However, even on Mother’s Day some of us wouldn’t set time aside to spend with our mothers. We would simply order some flowers from a company like 1-800-flowers, and have them sent to our mothers.

This new week marks the end of April, and Mother’s Day is right around the corner. Every day is Mother’s Day in my book. Here’s a little reminder to reach out and show some appreciation to the mothers in our lives. If you are a mother reading this, whether you’re a biological mother, an adoptive mother, a step mother, or a foster mother, happy Mother’s Day from Life with Charli!

Judgments and Assumptions

I made a new friend recently. I was invited to a function by a relative. I’m a bit of an introvert, but since I really wanted to support my relative I made an effort to show up. I’m usually shy around unfamiliar people, so I was nervous about going to the function. However, as soon as I started talking with one of my relative’s friends, she made the butterflies fly away almost instantly. She was so friendly that I felt very comfortable talking with her.

Part of the reason I get nervous when meeting new people is that sometimes I feel they will automatically think the worst of me. I’m afraid that I might leave a bad first impression. My social anxiety can sometimes be so bad that I like to avoid group meetings if I can help it. I also tend to spend hours picking an outfit for a simple, casual meeting. To top it all off, my brain would often go into overdrive trying to figure out what was going on in the mind of someone I just met. I find myself thinking that he or she probably found me weird or awkward, and might not be interested in getting to know me. Maybe I did something the person found odd or offensive. My family members often try to reassure me that most likely not one of those thoughts are in the heads of most people I meet.

In my last post, I talked about judging others before getting to know them. We often make a lot of assumptions about others based on their outward characteristics. For instance, if one sees a woman covered in diamonds, he or she would assume the woman is rich. I’ve come to realize that these are not the only types of assumptions we make, however. We also make assumptions about how others might perceive us. In my case, I sometimes assume everyone will quickly judge me before getting to know me. By doing so I sometimes don’t give others a chance at building a relationship with me, because I put up a wall. I feel the need to guard myself.

Talking with my relative’s friend helped me to step out of my comfort zone a little more. Even a couple of minutes after the function had already ended, we continued to enjoy each other’s company. We even discussed arranging a meeting sometime in the near future. That day, I was reminded that while there are those who might judge me without fully knowing me, not everyone is that way. I was reminded that not every person is the same, and that’s why I should give people I meet a chance, especially if that’s the same treatment I expect from them.

The Liebster Award

I was recently nominated for the Liebster Award by fellow blogger, Jessica Carter. I started blogging just around a month ago, so imagine my surprise when my blog received recognition already in just that short time! Thankyou so much Jessica! Be sure to check her awesome and resourceful blog! If you’re interested in the teaching profession, this is the blog for you! Jessica also has other posts with wonderful tips about college life, language learning, and blogging! Here’s the link: http://welcometospanish1.com/

About the Liebster Award

The Liebster Award is an online award given by bloggers to other bloggers to recognize new upcoming blogs.

Rules

1.Thank the nominator, and provide an link to their blog.

2. Answer the 11 questions the nominator asked.

3. Nominate 11 bloggers for the award (this award is for new and upcoming bloggers)

4. Come with 11 new questions to ask your nominees.

Questions

What would be your death-row meal?

Definitely a nice home cooked meal made by my parents

2. What is your favorite genre of book to read?

Hard! If I really had to choose though, I would say realistic fiction.

3. If you had an unlimited travel budget, where would you go and for how long?

I would go to Spain or Costa Rica, and stay for about a year maybe. Maybe I would be able to pick up some spanish during my stay!

4. Would you prefer to be rich and hated or loved and poor?

Loved and poor!

5. Why do you blog?

I want to share my experiences. The world would be a much better place if we all tried to understand each other.

6. If you could meet anyone alive or dead, who would it be?

Another hard question! But if I really had to pick I would choose…Paul from the Bible!

7. What’s the most crazy and reckless thing you’ve ever done?

I’m not very reckless or much of a risk taker! I would probably say starting this blog though, since I’m a pretty private person!

8. What’s your favorite blog post that you’ve written?

My latest post: Disability: Seeing the Unseen. It’s definitely been my most popular one so far!

9. If you had three wishes, what would you wish for?

Another hard question, but here are my three wises

World peace
Everyone to get help accomplishing their dreams
A little money!

10. Which would you prefer, living in the city or the country?

The country

11. What’s your favorite movie?

How to Train Your Dragon

My nominees (be sure to visit their lovely blogs):

Picking 11 out of all of the wonderful new blogs I’ve been reading was difficult, but here are my nominees:

Michelle Sanders – https://mxchelleex.wordpress.com/
Laura – https://laurapeat01.blog
Lauren – http://www.lifestyleoflauren.org
Jeremeé Duncan – https://overpoweringmswithkids.com
Jessica Harris – https://jessierenea.com/
I won’t say I’m in love with reading – https://iwontsayiminlovewithreading.wordpress.com/
Dopamine Queen – https://dopaminequeen.com/
Heidi Caedere – http://howtorelationship101.blogspot.com/
Lesley Skinner – https://doinglifewithhislight.com/
Nadine – https://homeofunderstanding.blog
Not Quite Carrie – https://notquitecarrie.com

My questions:

What your favorite color?
What’s your favorite snack to eat?
Do you like salty treats or do you have more of a sweet tooth?
What’s your favorite music genre?
Do you like taking risks or do you prefer playing it safe?
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
How do get inspiration for blog posts?
How would improve your blog moving forward?
How did you choose your blog niche?
What’s your favorite tv show?
Can you play an instrument?

Disability: Seeing the Unseen

“We hire Shaun and we give hope to…people with limitations that those limitations are not what they think they are, that they do have a shot!”
Dr. Aaron Glassman The Good Doctor Episode 1 Season 1

I’m a little late to joining the bandwagon as the show is already in its second season, but I started watching a show called The Good Doctor. For those who don’t know, the show is about a man named Shaun Murphy who is a surgeon. He also happens to be a man with autism. I’ve been really enjoying the show so far, and was inspired to tell me story about my own experiences as a person with a disability.

There is one word to covers the two reactions people with disabilities generally receive: doubt. There is either doubt in the person’s capabilities, or there is doubt that the person has a disability at all. In the show The Good Doctor, Shaun Murphy fits into the first category. His memory, visual spatial skills, and analytical skills are far above average. He is an asset to the hospital he is working in. However, many of his coworkers can’t see past his very apparent disability. I, on the other hand, fit into the latter category. My disability is invisible, and I often find myself having to prove that I actually am a person with a disability.

From the time I was a small girl, it was apparent to everyone in my inner circle that I was a little different from my peers. Spend enough time me, and one would definitely be able to see my deficits, but only if that person is paying close attention.

“You don’t seem like a person with a disability to me”, a friend once told me.

Little did she know that it’s that same sentiment that often makes it difficult for me to get the help I need. The specific kind of disability I have is learning disability. There are different kinds of learning disabilities, and most of them are language based. That means people with those types of learning disabilities have trouble with spoken or written communication. The most well known language based learning disability is dyslexia. Communication is not a problem for me though. In fact, I’ve been told that I express myself very well, especially through writing.

For me, the problem lies in processing. Many activities that might take other people minutes to complete can take hours for me, however, this would not be easy to notice through mere minutes of conversation with me.

“I wish I had your brain.”, a classmate from college once told me. She did not understand that it was not a superior intellect that made me successful during my time in college. It was my work ethic and perseverance that made me successful. Like any other person, I work extremely hard for what I want, and in some cases I have to put in even more effort than the average person.

For Shaun Murphy from The Good Doctor, his disability is front and center for those who meet him, and masks his capabilities. They don’t take the time to understand him and realize that his disability is only one part of who he is. That is a reality for many people with disability. In my case, people don’t take the time to understand that some disabilities are invisible, and you never know what someone might be going through. My take away from the show The Good Doctor and my experiences is that we might all have our different stories to tell, but there is one thing that connects us: the desire to be understood.

Single and Embracing it

“All I wanted was to teach a child to read.”

“The only children you should concern yourself with are…your own.”

“I’m…not ready to have children”

“Maybe you haven’t met the right man…oh Belle, do you know what happens to spinsters in this village after their father’s die? They beg for scraps like poor Agathe!”

Belle and Gaston, Beauty and the Beast (2017)

I won’t be telling my age, but I will tell you I’m no spring chicken! As I’ve been getting older, I have been reminded numerous times that I need to hurry up and get married already! There is definitely a stigma on older, single women. As women get older our value seems to decrease. We are less desirable, and constantly reminded that the clock is ticking. When the news of singer Cassie’s breakup with rapper and entrepreneur Diddy spread last year, many fans expressed frustration at the fact that Cassie was leaving an almost 10 year long relationship without a ring or any children. In other words, she didn’t get anything out of the long relationship, and she wasted so many years of her life. Last year was also when actress Gabriel Union shared her story on her struggle with a condition called endometriosis, saying that many people assumed she didn’t have children yet because she put off starting a family in favor of her career. She waited too long. Turns out this was very far from the truth. Children and marriage are beautiful things. However, they are not the end all be all of a woman’s life. To all my single ladies, there is nothing wrong with dreaming of starting family one day, but as you wait for your Prince Charming, here are some tips to help you enjoy the single life (to any single men who might be reading this, welcome! Maybe this blog post might benefit you too!):

Build Self Love

If you’re looking to get married, dating is a very important part of the process. It would be a mistake to rush into a relationship for wrong reasons. Your relationship status does not define your worth. If you just got out of a relationship, don’t feel you need to rush into the next one to feel worth and to feel loved. For those women who are older, don’t feel you like your value is decreasing because your age. Take the time while your are single to build confidence and self-love. Before declaring love for someone else, start with yourself.

Take Time for Discovery

Have you ever tried playing an instrument? Drawing? Painting? Knitting? Now is the time to try any one of these activities, or all of them if you want! There are many others activities to try as well! Don’t travel much? Now is the time to go wherever you want! Marriage and children are blessings, but your life changes drastically after becoming a spouse, and even more so after becoming a parent. If you are single right now, don’t spend your time feeling depressed over not having a spouse and children. Don’t feel jealous of all of those around you getting married and starting a family. Use this time to explore any hidden talents, or expand on talents you already know you have. I’m actually taking my own advice with my blog!

Romance can happen at any age. If you’re an older woman, don’t think it’s too late for you because you’re no longer in your prime, and don’t let your age push you into a quick relationship. Whether you are a man, woman, old, young, you have value. Take the time while you’re single to realize that!

Imperfectly Perfect: Life with Turner Syndrome

“Do you wear bras?”, a high school classmate asked me one day.

“No…”, I replied with anticipation, waiting for her to get to the point.

“You need to”, my classmate said, pointing at my “headlights”.

That was during my last year in high school. Since I had just started showing signs of puberty that year, I did not see the need for a bra. Needless to say, however, after what my classmate told me, I never went out without a bra again. I was what one might call a “late bloomer”, or so I thought. During the summer before my first year in high school, I was diagnosed with Turner syndrome. Turner syndrome is a genetic disorder that affects girls. The condition is characterized by the partial or complete absence of one X chromosome. Many girls find out they have the condition around the same age I did, because one important marker of Turner syndrome is the absence of puberty. Girls with Turner syndrome generally can not go through puberty without hormone replacement treatment (which I started during my last year in high school). I always knew that I was different from my female peers. I finally found out why.

When I hit my preteens I could not wait to transform into a beautiful swan. I watched all my female peers grow into beautiful young women, feeling more and more left behind with each passing year as I continued to show no signs of blooming. I couldn’t help thinking that I will always be an ugly duckling. I will never look like my female classmates, or the beautiful models I see on television or in magazines. My mother always tried to help me build a positive self image, but I just couldn’t let go of the feelings in my heart.

Not only did I feel unattractive, I also felt incomplete. Women with Turner syndrome are usually infertile, and I was told by doctors that I was likely no exception to that rule. This revelation made me believe that I was not a “real” woman. I did not look like a “real” woman, and my body did not function like one either. It took some time for me to realize that there is so much more to a woman than her appearance. A woman is not defined by her breasts or hips, nor is an ample amount of them the mark of a beautiful woman. Beauty and women come in different forms. A woman who undergoes a mastectomy is not any less of a woman because of her lack of breasts. A woman who is infertile is not less of a woman because of her inability to bear children. I am not less of a woman because of some characteristics I lack due to Turner syndrome. Every woman is unique, but the one thing we have in common is that we all have our own special brand of beauty.

In a world where many people feel the need to get cosmetic surgery to “fix” what they see as imperfections, it is hard to be confidant and not feel the need to join the bandwagon. It takes strength to follow one’s own path instead of following the crowd, and over the years I have been slowly trying to build the strength to come into my own. I am learning to look past my “imperfections” so that whenever I look in the mirror I see a work of art