Life with Charli

Christianity and Mental Health

Guest Submission by Lesley Skinner, Christian Blogger: visit her site and subscribe to her blog at https://doinglifewithhislight.com

Twitter: https://mobile.twitter.com/LesleyDlwhl

Facebook Page: https://m.facebook.com/doinglifewithhislight/

In any given year, 1 in 5 people in Canada will experience a mental health problem or illness (Canadian Mental Health Association, 2019). This means either yourself or someone you know has experienced mental health issues. Therefore, it is obvious Christians are not bypassed when it comes to the experience of mental health issues. The daily living mental health battles are very real for many Christians. Although similarities in the overall experience of mental health issues exists between Christians and Non- Christians, Christians do face unique challenges which can hinder their progress or help their progress towards managing and improving their mental health.

Stigma

When it comes to experiencing mental health issues something all people face is stigma. The Canadian Association of Mental Health says fear and misunderstanding often lead to prejudice against people with mental illness and addictions. Although it seems there are more campaigns in communities designed to decrease stigma and increase awareness about daily life challenges experienced by people who have mental health issues, the stigma surrounding persons who have mental health issues still exists. Unfortunately, education about mental health does not alter the thoughts and perceptions of all people in society and, therefore, stigma may always be a challenge faced by people experiencing mental health problems.

With regard to stigma, in contrast to non-believers, Christians may face a unique challenge. According to Pastor Stephen Altrogge in his article entitled “Is Mental Illness Considered Biblical?”, in the Christian world there are some people who believe mental health issues are not biblical. He explains the belief, for example, that being depressed is just the feeling of sadness and medical treatment defies the power of God to be sufficient in meeting your every need. Medical treatment for mental health issues is thought of as just a man made solution to a spiritual problem. Therefore, Christians feeling this stigma within their Christian circles will experience increased feelings of hopelessness, shame and this thinking can create a serious barrier for Christians to reach out for help and impact prompt diagnosis and treatment. Pastor Altrogge states, “If we’re going to effectively care for fellow Christians who struggle with mental illness, we need to recognize that mental illness is a real thing. We aren’t only souls. Rather, we are a complex composition of soul and body. Let’s make sure we address both the soul and the body.”

Spiritual Battle: A Closer Look

Mental illness is real and requires medical help just like any physical illness, but spiritual battles do exist and cannot be ignored. Someone once said to me, “Just as there is a positive and uplifting supernatural power supporting us and rooting for us on earth, we cannot forget there is also a negative supernatural power which exists to work against Gods plan for your life, to tear you down and destroy your destiny.” These words rang true to me and I am reminded of them every time depression creeps into my life. I am reminded not to forget the spiritual battle that do exist between good and evil in every facet of our daily lives. In order to examine all things which can be influencing our mental health, we cannot leave out examining the fact a spiritual battle may be happening and influencing your thoughts in a negative and mind altering way.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy, I came that they may have life and have it abundantly – John 10:10

If you are a Christian and are working diligently for God, you can be rest assured you will experience spiritual battles in your life as the enemy seeks to steal your joy and give you mental unrest.

If you are a Christian and are working diligently for God, you can be rest assured you will experience spiritual battles in your life as the enemy seeks to steal your joy and give you mental unrest. – Ephesians 6:12

Excessive and persistent negative thoughts and emotions is definitely a way the enemy can attack and try to stop you in your tracks. In the book “Battlefield of the Mind” by well known author Joyce Meyer, she says “The devil is a liar…He lies to you and me. He tells us things about ourselves, about other people and about circumstances that are just not true.”

The Christian awareness of how the enemy can attack our mind and affect our thoughts prompts us to reflect on this fact in times of mental unrest. This exploration and reflection helps the believer progress toward improving their mental health status. Many people who are not in tune spiritually may never realize the possibility of a supernatural battle existing in their life and hence do not spend the time reflecting and taking action against it.

Spiritual Battle: Fighting Back

How do Christians know if the negative thoughts and feelings experienced could be due to spiritual warefare? The answer to this lies with spiritual intuition provided by the Holy Spirit. Spiritual decernment through teachings of the Lord and through the work of the Holy Spirit helps Christians recognize and respond appropriately to situations which are not of God and, therefore, distinguish good from evil.

But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil- Hebrews 5:14

This scripture teaches that just like a child develops to the point where they can eat solid food, Christian’s also develop and mature to be able to better distinguish good from evil with learning and practice. For example, in my experience living with depression, I have experienced attacks which, based on reflection, has been due to spiritual warfare. When I am on a roll for Christ by moving deeper in the Word, following God’s leading, and working on His behalf through different initiatives both inside and outside the church, I will experience an attack of the enemy -Guaranteed. I may not recognize it immediately, but when the realization does come, I immediately get to work to take back control of my thoughts and my mind. You see the enemy knows your every weakness and, in my situation, the knowledge my mental health is vulnerable to attack places it in the enemies direct line of fire. For me, in the beginning of my Christian experience with spiritual warefare, it would make me pull away from God because of how uncomfortable the push back from the dark side would make me feel. But through guidance from my pastors and through my own reading and research, I have learned steps to take to overcome enemy attack, put the devil in his place, and gain control of my emotions and thoughts. His intimidation tactics no longer keep me from moving forward in Christ because over time, through maturity and practice, I have learned to identify what’s happening, ways to push back and overcome the devils strongholds in my mind. Freedom from attack may not happen over night, but it happens just the same with persistence and when you come out the other side, the victory is glorious as the experience moves you closer to God and you grow further in your Christian walk.

Spiritual Battle: Weapons of Attack

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteouysness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. – Ephesians 6: 13-17

This scripture reminds us to focus on your salvation, your faith, Gods promises and His truths located in His Word, and use them as weapons of attack. In my experience, starting with prayer and a frank discussion with God about your thoughts and feelings followed by asking Him to intervene to assist you in overcoming your negative thoughts and negative emotions has to be the starting point. From there focusing on the truths and promises of God, listening to and singing worship songs either in my mind or out loud, are ways I use to fight my battles. Writing has also become my new outlet. Here are some uplifting scriptures great for meditation and reflection to help cast down every negative thought and bring them into alignment with Jesus Christ:

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak -Isaiah 40:29

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand -Isaiah 41:10

No weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and this is their vindication from me,” declares the LORD – Isaiah 54:17

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future-Jeremiah 29:11

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go -Joshua 1:9

The LORD is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid? -Psalm 27:1

There are many powerful and uplifting scriptures which can help remind you that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, you have a father who loves you unconditionally, and He is there with you at all times to help you win your battles and to strengthen and encourage you. The more you meditate on His Word the more you will be able to draw upon its strength it provides in times of trouble. Joyce Meyer said in her book, mentioned earlier, “Truth is one of the most powerful weapons against the kingdom of darkness. Truth is light, and the Bible says that darkness has never overpowered the light, and it never will. Satan wants to keep things hidden in darkness, but the Holy Spirit wants to bring them into the light and deal with them, so you and I can be truly and genuinely free.”

Supporting Christians. With Mental Health Issues: Suggestions for Support Persons

From my experience living with depression and experiencing cycles of depression for many years, I am going to share with you a few of my thoughts about how to best help a person who comes to you to open up and talk about their struggles. This is the strategy I have found most helpful:

Develop Rapport: Instead of jumping right in and offering solutions, get to know the person and develop rapport. This will foster trust in the relationship and then the person, when you do start discussing solutions, will be more receptive to hearing them and will be more likely to follow through with suggestions. To develop rapport let the person know they are safe talking to you, you are interested in hearing all about everything which is bothering them and you are open to helping them figure out the next steps. Make sure when you talk you are in an environment where there are no distractions which can interrupt conversation and you have the time to sit, be attentive, and listen.
Speak Truth into the Conversation: While you are actively listening to conversation, ask the Holy Spirit to guide you with the right words to say to speak truth into their life. Sometimes a person will need to be reminded: what they are feeling is ok, you are glad they reached out, no one on earth is free from facing challenges, and no matter what they are facing God loves them unconditionally and offers them redemption and forgiveness and help. If you are led to pray at any point during the conversation, do it. Follow your leading.
Do not cause feeling of shame and guilt: In conversation with a person during the first 2 steps described above, it is imperative not to ask the questions: How is your prayer life lately? Have you been spending time with God? Have you been reading your bible lately? or make statements like: I noticed you haven’t been in church the last couple of Sundays, you know that not going to church is not a good coping strategy right? When someone is in a crisis situation which has prompted them to talk, the last thing you want to do is make them question their Christian walk and dredge up more shame and guilt. If this is a mental health issue like depression, for example, there may very well be well be well researched motivational issues affecting the persons ability to participate the way they would like in church, in their devotions, and in their prayer life so asking these questions does not help the persons self-esteem or their Christian walk. But encouraging the person to come to church for prayer and support the upcoming Sunday is a great approach in helping to motivate a person to stay connected to church and to God.
Help them determine next steps: Once conversation has happened as suggested above, helping someone determine next steps might be a simple question, “So, what do you feel like your next steps should be?” People often jump into telling people what they think they should do instead of letting the Holy Spirit work through the conversation to give the person insight into what the next step in their journey should be. Often times, people will make their own plans for their next step and all you have to do is support their choice or help them to think more about the choices they are making if you feel they may not be headed in the right direction. Open ended questions like, “If you do x, do you think it will help you get to where you need to be? Or do you think Y might be a better approach?” Actively engage the person in their own problem-solving and finding their own solutions providing guidance and encouragement to help the process.
End in Prayer: Close conversation in prayer thanking God for his intervention, and asking him to bless the plan chosen. If you feel like you should meet again and the feeling is mutual, then make plans to meet again.

Obviously, conversations may not go this smoothly depending on the situation you find yourself in. But for someone who is not suicidal, who has insight into their situation, and can be helped to come up with a rational next step on their journey, then this approach my be helpful. It is the approach I found most useful when I needed help and reached out to asked for assistance when I needed it over the past 6 years since becoming Christian.

Supporting Yourself When You Are going Through Deep Waters

As someone who is living with a mental illness, I know what it feels like and for all skeptics out there- its REAL. If you are reading this and are going through deep waters my friend, I want you to know you are not alone! I want you to know you have a Heavenly Father who loves you. I want you to know that, although it may not feel like it, what you are going through is temporary and you WILL get through this bump in the road.

Dear Friend, this is what I have come to realize on my journey and I feel in my spirit you should know this today:

It’s ok to say “No”
It’s ok to set healthy boundaries- whatever that may look like for you
It’s ok not to feel ok
It’s ok not to be perfect
It’s ok to ask for help
It’s ok to seek medical attention- mental health is real and medical advice IS needed
It’s ok to seek professional counselling- I have had counselling many times throughout my 17 year illness. Research shows a combination of counselling and medical treatment is the best combination in treating mental health issues. Find yourself a good Christian counsellor who can provide the Christian insight and truth you need to help you on your journey

In conclusion, the mental health illness experience is Real and Christians are not exempt in this life from experiencing challenges to their mental health. Christians need to seek medical advice, get medical treatment, but at the same time be aware spiritual battles do exist. Christians need to consider the possibility they could be facing a spiritual battle and, in combination with medical treatment, examine and reflect on this truth either themselves or with the help of a Pastor or Christian counsellor. Christians also need the right peer support to help them find the right spirit led direction without the relationship leading to the exacerbation of feelings of shame and guilt.

My prayer today is this post has blessed someone. If you feel this is important information to share to shed light on Christianity and Mental Health and to help Christians who may be experiencing challenges, please share.

Resources

Canadian Association of Mental Health (2019). Addressing Stigma. Retrieved from: https://www.camh.ca/en/driving-change/addressing-stigma

Pastor Steven Altrogge. Is Mental Health Considered Biblical? Retrieved from: https://www.biblestudytools.com/blogs/stephen-altrogge/is-mental-illness-actually-biblical.html

Meyer, Joyce (1995). Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in your Mind. New York, NY: updated FaithWords Edition 2011

Judgments and Assumptions

I made a new friend recently. I was invited to a function by a relative. I’m a bit of an introvert, but since I really wanted to support my relative I made an effort to show up. I’m usually shy around unfamiliar people, so I was nervous about going to the function. However, as soon as I started talking with one of my relative’s friends, she made the butterflies fly away almost instantly. She was so friendly that I felt very comfortable talking with her.

Part of the reason I get nervous when meeting new people is that sometimes I feel they will automatically think the worst of me. I’m afraid that I might leave a bad first impression. My social anxiety can sometimes be so bad that I like to avoid group meetings if I can help it. I also tend to spend hours picking an outfit for a simple, casual meeting. To top it all off, my brain would often go into overdrive trying to figure out what was going on in the mind of someone I just met. I find myself thinking that he or she probably found me weird or awkward, and might not be interested in getting to know me. Maybe I did something the person found odd or offensive. My family members often try to reassure me that most likely not one of those thoughts are in the heads of most people I meet.

In my last post, I talked about judging others before getting to know them. We often make a lot of assumptions about others based on their outward characteristics. For instance, if one sees a woman covered in diamonds, he or she would assume the woman is rich. I’ve come to realize that these are not the only types of assumptions we make, however. We also make assumptions about how others might perceive us. In my case, I sometimes assume everyone will quickly judge me before getting to know me. By doing so I sometimes don’t give others a chance at building a relationship with me, because I put up a wall. I feel the need to guard myself.

Talking with my relative’s friend helped me to step out of my comfort zone a little more. Even a couple of minutes after the function had already ended, we continued to enjoy each other’s company. We even discussed arranging a meeting sometime in the near future. That day, I was reminded that while there are those who might judge me without fully knowing me, not everyone is that way. I was reminded that not every person is the same, and that’s why I should give people I meet a chance, especially if that’s the same treatment I expect from them.

The Liebster Award

I was recently nominated for the Liebster Award by fellow blogger, Jessica Carter. I started blogging just around a month ago, so imagine my surprise when my blog received recognition already in just that short time! Thankyou so much Jessica! Be sure to check her awesome and resourceful blog! If you’re interested in the teaching profession, this is the blog for you! Jessica also has other posts with wonderful tips about college life, language learning, and blogging! Here’s the link: http://welcometospanish1.com/

About the Liebster Award

The Liebster Award is an online award given by bloggers to other bloggers to recognize new upcoming blogs.

Rules

1.Thank the nominator, and provide an link to their blog.

2. Answer the 11 questions the nominator asked.

3. Nominate 11 bloggers for the award (this award is for new and upcoming bloggers)

4. Come with 11 new questions to ask your nominees.

Questions

What would be your death-row meal?

Definitely a nice home cooked meal made by my parents

2. What is your favorite genre of book to read?

Hard! If I really had to choose though, I would say realistic fiction.

3. If you had an unlimited travel budget, where would you go and for how long?

I would go to Spain or Costa Rica, and stay for about a year maybe. Maybe I would be able to pick up some spanish during my stay!

4. Would you prefer to be rich and hated or loved and poor?

Loved and poor!

5. Why do you blog?

I want to share my experiences. The world would be a much better place if we all tried to understand each other.

6. If you could meet anyone alive or dead, who would it be?

Another hard question! But if I really had to pick I would choose…Paul from the Bible!

7. What’s the most crazy and reckless thing you’ve ever done?

I’m not very reckless or much of a risk taker! I would probably say starting this blog though, since I’m a pretty private person!

8. What’s your favorite blog post that you’ve written?

My latest post: Disability: Seeing the Unseen. It’s definitely been my most popular one so far!

9. If you had three wishes, what would you wish for?

Another hard question, but here are my three wises

World peace
Everyone to get help accomplishing their dreams
A little money!

10. Which would you prefer, living in the city or the country?

The country

11. What’s your favorite movie?

How to Train Your Dragon

My nominees (be sure to visit their lovely blogs):

Picking 11 out of all of the wonderful new blogs I’ve been reading was difficult, but here are my nominees:

Michelle Sanders – https://mxchelleex.wordpress.com/
Laura – https://laurapeat01.blog
Lauren – http://www.lifestyleoflauren.org
Jeremeé Duncan – https://overpoweringmswithkids.com
Jessica Harris – https://jessierenea.com/
I won’t say I’m in love with reading – https://iwontsayiminlovewithreading.wordpress.com/
Dopamine Queen – https://dopaminequeen.com/
Heidi Caedere – http://howtorelationship101.blogspot.com/
Lesley Skinner – https://doinglifewithhislight.com/
Nadine – https://homeofunderstanding.blog
Not Quite Carrie – https://notquitecarrie.com

My questions:

What your favorite color?
What’s your favorite snack to eat?
Do you like salty treats or do you have more of a sweet tooth?
What’s your favorite music genre?
Do you like taking risks or do you prefer playing it safe?
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
How do get inspiration for blog posts?
How would improve your blog moving forward?
How did you choose your blog niche?
What’s your favorite tv show?
Can you play an instrument?

Disability: Seeing the Unseen

“We hire Shaun and we give hope to…people with limitations that those limitations are not what they think they are, that they do have a shot!”
Dr. Aaron Glassman The Good Doctor Episode 1 Season 1

I’m a little late to joining the bandwagon as the show is already in its second season, but I started watching a show called The Good Doctor. For those who don’t know, the show is about a man named Shaun Murphy who is a surgeon. He also happens to be a man with autism. I’ve been really enjoying the show so far, and was inspired to tell me story about my own experiences as a person with a disability.

There is one word to covers the two reactions people with disabilities generally receive: doubt. There is either doubt in the person’s capabilities, or there is doubt that the person has a disability at all. In the show The Good Doctor, Shaun Murphy fits into the first category. His memory, visual spatial skills, and analytical skills are far above average. He is an asset to the hospital he is working in. However, many of his coworkers can’t see past his very apparent disability. I, on the other hand, fit into the latter category. My disability is invisible, and I often find myself having to prove that I actually am a person with a disability.

From the time I was a small girl, it was apparent to everyone in my inner circle that I was a little different from my peers. Spend enough time me, and one would definitely be able to see my deficits, but only if that person is paying close attention.

“You don’t seem like a person with a disability to me”, a friend once told me.

Little did she know that it’s that same sentiment that often makes it difficult for me to get the help I need. The specific kind of disability I have is learning disability. There are different kinds of learning disabilities, and most of them are language based. That means people with those types of learning disabilities have trouble with spoken or written communication. The most well known language based learning disability is dyslexia. Communication is not a problem for me though. In fact, I’ve been told that I express myself very well, especially through writing.

For me, the problem lies in processing. Many activities that might take other people minutes to complete can take hours for me, however, this would not be easy to notice through mere minutes of conversation with me.

“I wish I had your brain.”, a classmate from college once told me. She did not understand that it was not a superior intellect that made me successful during my time in college. It was my work ethic and perseverance that made me successful. Like any other person, I work extremely hard for what I want, and in some cases I have to put in even more effort than the average person.

For Shaun Murphy from The Good Doctor, his disability is front and center for those who meet him, and masks his capabilities. They don’t take the time to understand him and realize that his disability is only one part of who he is. That is a reality for many people with disability. In my case, people don’t take the time to understand that some disabilities are invisible, and you never know what someone might be going through. My take away from the show The Good Doctor and my experiences is that we might all have our different stories to tell, but there is one thing that connects us: the desire to be understood.

Single and Embracing it

“All I wanted was to teach a child to read.”

“The only children you should concern yourself with are…your own.”

“I’m…not ready to have children”

“Maybe you haven’t met the right man…oh Belle, do you know what happens to spinsters in this village after their father’s die? They beg for scraps like poor Agathe!”

Belle and Gaston, Beauty and the Beast (2017)

I won’t be telling my age, but I will tell you I’m no spring chicken! As I’ve been getting older, I have been reminded numerous times that I need to hurry up and get married already! There is definitely a stigma on older, single women. As women get older our value seems to decrease. We are less desirable, and constantly reminded that the clock is ticking. When the news of singer Cassie’s breakup with rapper and entrepreneur Diddy spread last year, many fans expressed frustration at the fact that Cassie was leaving an almost 10 year long relationship without a ring or any children. In other words, she didn’t get anything out of the long relationship, and she wasted so many years of her life. Last year was also when actress Gabriel Union shared her story on her struggle with a condition called endometriosis, saying that many people assumed she didn’t have children yet because she put off starting a family in favor of her career. She waited too long. Turns out this was very far from the truth. Children and marriage are beautiful things. However, they are not the end all be all of a woman’s life. To all my single ladies, there is nothing wrong with dreaming of starting family one day, but as you wait for your Prince Charming, here are some tips to help you enjoy the single life (to any single men who might be reading this, welcome! Maybe this blog post might benefit you too!):

Build Self Love

If you’re looking to get married, dating is a very important part of the process. It would be a mistake to rush into a relationship for wrong reasons. Your relationship status does not define your worth. If you just got out of a relationship, don’t feel you need to rush into the next one to feel worth and to feel loved. For those women who are older, don’t feel you like your value is decreasing because your age. Take the time while your are single to build confidence and self-love. Before declaring love for someone else, start with yourself.

Take Time for Discovery

Have you ever tried playing an instrument? Drawing? Painting? Knitting? Now is the time to try any one of these activities, or all of them if you want! There are many others activities to try as well! Don’t travel much? Now is the time to go wherever you want! Marriage and children are blessings, but your life changes drastically after becoming a spouse, and even more so after becoming a parent. If you are single right now, don’t spend your time feeling depressed over not having a spouse and children. Don’t feel jealous of all of those around you getting married and starting a family. Use this time to explore any hidden talents, or expand on talents you already know you have. I’m actually taking my own advice with my blog!

Romance can happen at any age. If you’re an older woman, don’t think it’s too late for you because you’re no longer in your prime, and don’t let your age push you into a quick relationship. Whether you are a man, woman, old, young, you have value. Take the time while you’re single to realize that!

Imperfectly Perfect: Life with Turner Syndrome

“Do you wear bras?”, a high school classmate asked me one day.

“No…”, I replied with anticipation, waiting for her to get to the point.

“You need to”, my classmate said, pointing at my “headlights”.

That was during my last year in high school. Since I had just started showing signs of puberty that year, I did not see the need for a bra. Needless to say, however, after what my classmate told me, I never went out without a bra again. I was what one might call a “late bloomer”, or so I thought. During the summer before my first year in high school, I was diagnosed with Turner syndrome. Turner syndrome is a genetic disorder that affects girls. The condition is characterized by the partial or complete absence of one X chromosome. Many girls find out they have the condition around the same age I did, because one important marker of Turner syndrome is the absence of puberty. Girls with Turner syndrome generally can not go through puberty without hormone replacement treatment (which I started during my last year in high school). I always knew that I was different from my female peers. I finally found out why.

When I hit my preteens I could not wait to transform into a beautiful swan. I watched all my female peers grow into beautiful young women, feeling more and more left behind with each passing year as I continued to show no signs of blooming. I couldn’t help thinking that I will always be an ugly duckling. I will never look like my female classmates, or the beautiful models I see on television or in magazines. My mother always tried to help me build a positive self image, but I just couldn’t let go of the feelings in my heart.

Not only did I feel unattractive, I also felt incomplete. Women with Turner syndrome are usually infertile, and I was told by doctors that I was likely no exception to that rule. This revelation made me believe that I was not a “real” woman. I did not look like a “real” woman, and my body did not function like one either. It took some time for me to realize that there is so much more to a woman than her appearance. A woman is not defined by her breasts or hips, nor is an ample amount of them the mark of a beautiful woman. Beauty and women come in different forms. A woman who undergoes a mastectomy is not any less of a woman because of her lack of breasts. A woman who is infertile is not less of a woman because of her inability to bear children. I am not less of a woman because of some characteristics I lack due to Turner syndrome. Every woman is unique, but the one thing we have in common is that we all have our own special brand of beauty.

In a world where many people feel the need to get cosmetic surgery to “fix” what they see as imperfections, it is hard to be confidant and not feel the need to join the bandwagon. It takes strength to follow one’s own path instead of following the crowd, and over the years I have been slowly trying to build the strength to come into my own. I am learning to look past my “imperfections” so that whenever I look in the mirror I see a work of art

This is Life: Your Purpose Your Gift

Some time ago, I watched an interesting episode of a show called This is Life with my father. The host of the show is American Journalist Lisa Ling. The name of the episode was “America’s Busiest Coroners”. This is life focuses on shedding light on the unconventional lives of ordinary people in America. The Episode “America’s Busiest Coroners” focused on the people who deal with America’s dead. For this episode, Ling interviewed and shadowed the workers in the Los Angelos Coroner’s Office.

During one part of the episode one of the workers took Ling to into the room where the bodies are kept. All of the bodies were stacked on top of each other like sardines. The worker told Ling that everyone who dies in Los Angelos ends up there. It doesn’t matter how wealthy or poor the person was. Everyone ends up in the same place after death.

Another portion of the episode went over what happens to a dead body when it cannot be identified and no one claims it. When a dead body is brought to the coroner’s office an autopsy is done to determine cause of death, and an attempt at discovering the identity of the deceased person is made. Loved ones are also contacted, and the body is claimed. If the workers can not reach any loved ones of the deceased person, and the body is not claimed, the body is cremated and buried through the coroner’s office.

One such body at the coroner’s office was found hanging from a tree. An apparent suicide. The person was an Asian American. This hit home with Lisa Ling, who is an Asian American herself. Ling couldn’t help but wonder if this person was alone in America. Possibly this person had no family in the U.S. with him, and he fell into what he thought was a hopeless situation.

The end of the episode showed how the unclaimed dead were honored in the Los Angelos community. Every year people in the community gathered at the grave site of the unclaimed dead to pay their respects. Anyone in the community is welcome. Lisa Ling attended one of those gatherings, and she was very touched. Some of those people may have died alone, and we don’t know their names, but they were still human beings with their own dreams and stories.

My father put into one word how we both felt after watching that episode of This is Life: “humbled”. It was a humbling experience. The episode reminded us of our mortality, and that everyone dies someday. Some sooner than their time. Death is not the most comfortable topic for most people, and no one wants to die alone. The episode “America’s Busiest Coroners” of This is Life made me think deeply on this topic. I don’t know what the future holds for me, however, I do know that I am a single woman. Also, I have my parents won’t be around forever. I have siblings, and though I know I can depend on them whenever I need them, they have their own lives to live. Will I be alone when I die? I don’t know. Will my body be treated with respect after I die? I hope it will, but I don’t know. Again, my future is uncertain, and how am I to know what happens to my body after I die?

“It doesn’t matter what what happens after you die.”, was my father’s response. “What matter’s is what you do during your life while you’re alive”.

I completely agree. “The dead praise not the Lord, neither any that go down into silence”. Psalms 115:17. I don’t know what the future holds, however, I know that I can choose in the present to do the best I can with what time God gives me on this earth. To those reading this, know that you are kings and queens. You have a purpose. Use your gifts to do what you can, while you can.

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

I’ve always loved writing, and I’ve always been pretty good at it! At least that’s what I’ve been told! I’ve been thinking of starting a blog for a while, and I’ve finally gotten a little time to do so! Sometimes we are too busy to slow down and do things we enjoy. Sometimes we let our talents go to waste because we are too busy to develop them. Life is too short to not enjoy it! So here I am writing my first blog post! What are your hidden talents? Do you take the time to appreciate your gifts and share them? Let me know in the comments, and stay tuned for upcoming blogs! Thanks for the support!